one of my girlfriends always teases me about how i love to shoot and post pictures of my children sleeping. i always joke back, “i like them best that way!”
i do love how quiet and still they are. how their chests move in rhythm with their breath. i love to see how big they look in their beds all stretched out and relaxed, their bodies tall and healthy, their hearts strong and happy. if i look closely enough i think i see them growing, right in front of me; my eyes play tricks, but it still makes me smile, and at the same time there is a twinge of sadness, because it is all just going so fast!
the old adage really is true: they do really grow so quickly!!
lark turns four today. tomorrow she will turn 16, then i will turn around and she will be graduating from high school and heading to harvard with a full scholarship. then she’ll be studying abroad and applying to grad programs. while abroad she’ll find work with a top fashion agency that will always give us the leftover season samples. she will fall madly in love with a fortune 500 genius who will all set us up for early retirement and will purchase us homes, next door to each other, in the hampton’s. where we will spend the rest of our days watching lark’s children, our grandchildren, grow as quickly as she did while we pick and eat wild grapes, watch every lazy day’s lazy sunset, and play interminable games of monopoly.
her future, (as i see it ;)) is all going to happen so fast.
i was talking to my dad the other day on the phone. after covering all the basics: health, business, children’s developmental skills and behavior, weather, holiday plans, and politics, i got a little emotional when he asked how i was doing. i was coming out of my 4th really tough mommy day so i broke down a bit and told him that it was just hard being a mom right now. i was speaking the truth. it’s the hardest job, mommy-ing. you work over time every day without pay, never get any sick days, rarely get to be alone to finish one cohesive thought in your head (including your basic level of human need: visiting the bathroom. that always includes at least two additional small people who feel that exact moment of time is best to discuss their basic human needs.), and the benefits, although they are there, can be hard to see at times.
my dad told me i was doing a good job, and that i was the best mom to larkin and gunnar.
that’s what i needed to hear.
although the greatest challenge, it is also the greatest gift.
i loved year three with lark. so much. it was so fun. her personality started to really emerge. she started talking in full and complete sentences, which was really cool (and now she just doesn’t stop talking at all! ;)).
she’s in her room right now playing with her best little friend. i can hear them singing, giggling, and imaging all sorts of great things for themselves and the five extra “friends” they have created that are “in” the room with them too. it’s the sweetest sound and is making me smile!
i love you! we all do! you add so much glitter and charisma to our family! you are sass, sunshine, and sparkle all rolled into one spirited body; you really are sass-tastic!! i love how much you love to shop, dress-up, do make-up and nails; you are so feminine, so pink, and so very pretty!! you are the sweetest part of every one of my days, and i love being with you!! can’t wait for year four!! love you, baby!!
xxoo mom, dad, and gun
here’s to all the memories we are making; may we hold on to them forever! happy birthday, my love!